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D.C. blog takes a shot at Columbus Crew SC's suspended player

Our colleagues at Black & Red United are making some interesting claims.

MLS: Columbus Crew SC at Houston Dynamo Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

Well, it seems that our esteemed colleagues and frenemies at Black and Red United have Columbus Crew SC all figured out.

The game between the Black & Gold and D.C. United has already been won and it seems all hope is lost for Crew SC. There is no need for the Black & Gold to make the trip to D.C. (to risk getting tetanus from the crumbling RFK stadium) as Columbus will be without Jonathan Mensah, the “worst starter in MLS outside of the state of Minnesota.”

Now my friends in D.C. need to realize that words hurt. Pretty bold statement coming from a fanbase that has a stadium that is older than Keith Richards.

What do I mean by this exactly? RFK Stadium has been allowed to linger WAY past any hope of a dignified end. It has been on life support for so long that people who like to reminisce about the “good old days” just can't seem to let it go. Those are probably the people that still use cash instead of debit cards and probably think that the Motorola Razr is still a cool phone.

I know that the fanbase is still mourning the loss of the Pele of offside calls Jairo Arrieta (you’re welcome by the way,) but you cannot be so quick to throw shade Jonathan’s way. I didn’t realize we could determine how well a transfer is performing two matches into the season. In that case, we have to say that Jonathan is the best defender to ever dawn the black & gold. We would even be so bold to say he beats our beloved John Harkes.

Seriously though, Jonathan has 57 caps to his credit for his nation of Ghana and, despite being a defender, has an international goal on his résumé. Jonathan played and started in the 2010 and 2014 FIFA World Cups and competed abroad, most recently in the Russian Premier League.

Would you guys want to play there on the European schedule? We didn't think so.

Jonathan has also scored eight times in his career, and I don’t think that is bad for “the worst defender in MLS outside of the state of Minnesota.”

Good thing your team doesn’t have to face him. Maybe you’ll actually score a goal.

Before you take a shot at Jonathan Menseh United faithful, remember you have Taylor Kemp and last I checked his match rating is lower than Jonathan’s this season. Plus, Ethan Finlay really loves to play against him. Would you like a friendly reminder from Decision Day 2015?

We write this because we care and you really need to get some help for Taylor Kemp. In the spirit of St. Paddy’s Day weekend, get the man a pint of Guinness because I think he has been really depressed since Perry Kitchen departed. It may also help him when he realizes that statistically he is the worst defender outside of the state of Minnesota.